In a world where emotional intelligence and mindfulness are the main topics of all mainstream trainings and workshops, we are bombarded with too many tools, which leave us puzzled. I often think after listening to a podcast or reading an article, that ok, I read a book and I feel my confidence is up but what are the practical steps I can practice everyday. I have tried affirmations, meditation etc., but I needed something which I could anytime like while walking, travelling, listening etc. I gather that it doesn’t have to be difficult if we start small and keep it simple. So, I sought the most common activity that I do in a day, which is “Interacting with people” and I thought how can I be mindful or increase my “EQ” while listening and talking?

Here are few tips that I came up with which might help you to be present whether is it while talking to someone or simply listening to someone:

  • Do not multi-task – Give the person your full, undivided attention. Most of the people today complain of the other person does not hear them properly, they are either busy on their phones, or typing on their laptops or simply appearing to be not-interesting (rude!!)
  • Recap or Summarize what the person is sharing – Always remember to summarize what the person just told you. It will solve two purposes, one that you will have to give your undivided attention to him/her (step 1) to understand and secondly once you summarize correctly, the person will trust you with more information.
  • WAIT !! – Yes, stop and think about the person’s query or discussion topic before forming opinions or giving rehearsed answers. Don’t worry, person will appreciate if you will take a pause and answer him what he wants to know or simply know your opinion.
  • Breathe – Simple, isn’t it. Remember to breathe as it brings your focus to what’s most important at that moment – which is? – The person in front of you.

So, what so you think? Are they easy enough for you? Please share your thoughts!!

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218 thoughts on “Are you really listening to what I am saying?

  1. Yes it is possible to be fully present however I think many aspects of our modern world have made it easy for us to forget. All good reminders. I saw a child on a tablet in Target asking his mother to ‘steer’ him while she shopped so he wouldn’t have to look up from his screen. That image haunts me often 😉 By all means please keep writing on this!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Excellent write up and very practical tips. Its pretty important to listen and interpret what the other person saying and that way we can understand the other person pretty well, either give him a reply / feedback accordingly or atleast we can make the other person feel comfortable, totally agree that we need to concentrate on breathing in situations like panic, confusion, feeling low. Its easy and effective. Thanks a ton for writing this, very helpful.

    Liked by 1 person

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