When the going gets tough, do you get even tougher on yourself? Tearing yourself down with self-criticism or building yourself up with inflated self-esteem are two sure ways to prolong a hard time.

Be kind to yourself!!

It’s not about judging yourself positively, it’s relating to yourself kindly—whether you’re succeeding or failing. There are three pillars of self-compassion: mindfulness, common humanity and self-kindness.

If you’re endlessly ruminating about the last argument you had, chances are you’re not being mindful. It’s difficult to deal with your present situation when you’re getting carried away by the dramatic storyline of what’s upsetting you in your life. If you find yourself at work still going over the dialogue of your fight with your loved one, recognize that it’s upsetting you, and then focus on the present moment: that deadline you have coming up, the never ending list of tasks at work etc. You can address your concerns with a talk in person, rather than try to solve a problem from your desk at work.

Self-kindness is not only releasing self-judgment but also active self soothing. So aside from forgiving yourself and not beating yourself up, go out of your way to reassure yourself and offer understanding and caring words.

Do you feel unworthy of kindness? How have you set your mind about your value and lovable-ness? Deep down, where it counts, how do you feel about yourself? What have you not forgiven yourself for?  What prior experience is continuing to dominate your thoughts, beliefs and feelings – most likely without your conscious permission or attention?

Do you have these  answers?

 

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13 thoughts on “Daily Dose of Inspiration – Be Kind to Yourself First

  1. I’m picturing a figure eight in my mind in response to your post, which is really well done, in my point of view. The figure eight “cycle” starts at the top center and works its way counter-clock wise, just as you’d expect. The first loop is what you’ve been told about yourself by others that at the time you knew was not based in truth. But as you continued to hear it, sometime from without, sometimes from within, you started believing the lie. The next segment on the way down provided your reality check. Someone came along and told you the truth in love and you started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. As the next segment reaches the bottom, you recognize that in order to reach your true potential, you need to invest in others. When the loop reaches the next stage, you realize that in seeking the best for others makes you more complete than you’ve ever felt before. As you come back to the top, your self-talk has changed dramatically because it isn’t based on someone else voice in your mind. This is when everything you’ve been hoping for can come true. Not just for yourself, but for all of the people who believe in you.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’m picturing a figure eight in my mind in response to your post, which is really well done, in my point of view. The figure eight “cycle” starts at the top center and works its way clock wise, just as you’d expect. The first loop is what you’ve been told about yourself by others that at the time you knew was not based in truth. But as you continued to hear it, sometime from without, sometimes from within, you started believing the lie. The next segment on the way down provided your reality check. Someone came along and told you the truth in love and you started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. As the next segment reaches the bottom, you recognize that in order to reach your true potential, you need to invest in others. When the loop reaches the next stage, you realize that in seeking the best for others makes you more complete than you’ve ever felt before. As you come back to the top, your self-talk has changed dramatically because it isn’t based on someone else voice in your mind. This is when everything you’ve been hoping for can come true. Not just for yourself, but for all of the people who believe in you.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is a great post on the importance of positive self-talk! Often, we treat ourselves so harshly and fail to see how horrific it would be if that were another person talking to us or vice versa. We must witness, not judge, our present state and then guide ourselves back into alignment or accept things as they are. Easier said than done, of course, but great to see this discussed here as it is so often reduced to an undervalued cliche.

    Liked by 2 people

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