Detaching yourself from others’ behaviors is great, in theory, but it’s a difficult thing to actually do. It takes a lot of personal strength and mental bravery to recognize that you can be happy and positive no matter what other people do. It’s completely possible — it’s just hard. I mean how can you have a good relationship with someone and not care what they do?? How can you remain unaffected with whatever your loved ones do?

But psychologist say that by not caring, we can stop trying to change those we love. We can fully accept them for who they are and, as a result, be at peace with whatever they do. This will give you peace of mind and will let the other person has his peace of mind too.

So how do we go about it? Well, I have a few personal favourites that I would like to share here:

/ Remember that you are powerless over others. No matter what you would like to believe, you have zero control over others. Realize this and you will free yourself from a lot of mental anguish.

/ Focus on the positive things about yourself. Sometimes when we’re dealing with an upsetting behavior, we forget to focus on the positive things about ourselves — like our strength or our resilience. Remind yourself of your awesomeness. 

/ Find your own unique sources of happiness. Relying 100% on one person is a big no-no when it comes to having a happy relationship. It’s key to find some activities/people you can enjoy outside of the relationship you have with a significant other and/or family member.

The idea of “live and let live” is a tough one to abide by. In theory it sounds great, but it’s hard to keep it in mind when you’re dealing with loved ones who, let’s face it, can drive you crazy at times. It’s incredibly difficult not to be influenced by the people we surround ourselves with and, unfortunately, we can’t always choose who we have around us. And, for that reason, we have to make the most of the relationships in our lives. It’s tempting to be critical and to want to change others, but remember that change must come from within and it’s not up to us to change other people.

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

29 thoughts on “Daily Dose of Inspiration – Detachment

  1. This is the truth. It is difficult to truly allow someone to be him or herself. One thing I would add that I do is to remember that I want people to accept me for who I am. I do not want to be changed, at all. The moment I think I should change someone is the moment that I know I have to stop and reflect on myself.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Pingback: ACHIEVE | HAPPY
  3. This is a really valuable lesson. Great post! I have had lots of practise in it during past months. I have gotten personally much better, I am in the best state I maybe have EVER been. Still, many, most actually of my loved ones are having a really hard time. The ones I spend most time with for example, my fiancé Jenni and my brother are having really hard time mentally and can not go into school right now even though they want. I started to fear it was my fault but once I released the arrogance and same time the ultimate self doubt of it accepting they are people of their own as am I.. I started to truly realize why they are having such a hard time and why I was scared I did it. Other things include cancer with my grandmother and just loads of sickess in many others I love. It has been hard to not be affected about it too much but I have. I still care about them a lot and I cry often but it does not keep me down, stressed or sad. I just let myself feel when it is the right time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Your last line is the most powerful. “I just let myself feel when it is the right time”. You have to feel the emotions to get over them. They may cloud your judgement at first but sooner you get to see the lesion behind it!! Beautiful. Thank you for sharing your story, it’s truly inspirational.
      Best to you

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You indeed have to and exactly.. The sooner the lesson behind it reveals itself. Everything can be learned from if you just let yourself feel and learn but keep yourself focused. By focused I mean that I always keep in mind when processing and feeling the hardest of things that I will get through this. Warms my heart that you found it inspirational. 🙂 My pleasure to share.

        All the best you as well! May we all find true peace.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. While I agree we should not try to change people who do not want to be helped, I also feel we must remain loyal and loving to those whose behaviors may push us away but who need our love. My wife has Alzheimers and often her behavior is far from loving and rational, but she both deserves and needs my unconditional love and support.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s