How many times have we all tried to manipulate situations and relationships to make them work out the way we wanted? How often have we tried to control people and things we just simply had no control over?

Sometimes if we try as hard as we can — when we are forceful enough or persistent enough — we can get the outcome we want. Or so we think… But how many of us have had the experience of getting that desired outcome, for a time, only to have it blow up in our face? Why does that happen? Because if it doesn’t open — or if it takes too much manipulation or scheming or controlling to keep it open, it’s truly not the door we’re supposed to walk through.

So when to stop or when to give up?

When you are committed to the idea of “not giving up” because that is what we have been told, over and over, is the ultimate sign of weakness. When you have allowed this mantra of “powering through” and “holding on” to keep you locked in a career or a social circle or a continent that does not understand you for years on end. When you know that you no longer love someone, at least not enough to envision any kind of real future with them, and you stay with them anyway because it is the “right” thing to do — no matter how much more it may hurt both of you in the long run — it is time to move on.

 

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24 thoughts on “Daily Dose of Inspiration – Not Your Door

  1. There is a lot of truth and wisdom in what you say here. I’ve learned the hard way that we cannot force life to go the way it’s not meant to. Now I believe in reading the signs. They are there pointing the right path for us but we often fail to see them, we are so busy with our preconceived agendas. Thanks for this thoughtful insight!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Moving on can be an individual choice when it come to sticking to your career,social or friends circle.But moving on in a married relationship is a different ball game.In my view,you just can’t get out of a married relationship,simply because you don’d love or see a future with each other..Dont we have responsibility towards the future of our children.Is it not our responsibility to think about the pain and trauma our children will have to undergo incase a wife or husband decides to move on just because they dont see futute with eac other.Can we be so selfish? secondly, what is the guarantee that that moving on will give you a secured future and those problems will not arise bcz of which we moved on.Will it not be like shifting from one frypan to another.Therefore,maturity lies in compromising with the situation and keep trying for a better relationship
    through right thinking and not lose hope for a better future with each other.Even if this does not happen,one can still live with each other provided you want to.
    These are my personal views.You hv rights to agree or disagree with me.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is a bit ignorant ’cause it lacks perspective and contradicts the quote itself in a way by acknowledging things that really don’t fit with it (the manipulation bit)

    With this kind of mindset, you might as well as never start anything if you truly believe that “powering through” as a sign of weakness. That, along with healing, forgiveness, etc. are a lot more complicated than that.

    It is easy to sit up there and preach about how you should do this or that while ignoring A-Z, but it makes your message fall flat if you continuously ignore the exceptions to certain rules of thumb.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I’ve always disliked the oversimplification of the “not your door” idea. Most successful people have had to show great persistence in getting that closed door to finally open for them. It is also frustrating to be so bombarded with opposing motivational messages, no matter how well-intentioned. Do we hang in there and keep fighting for our dreams, or do we let go, give up, move on? We can’t have both. Me? I’m a quitter, through and through. I don’t give up and then try other doors, either. Why waste time and peace of mind fighting for anything? I only set tangible goals, which are guaranteed to succeed if I work at it consistently. If it depends at all on another person, then forget it. I won’t waste my time or energy. My own doors are always open to myself.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Yes I agree with you…
    Sometimes we don’t give up on an idea or career because we have invested so much time and effort in it that we fear the lame judgements and criticisms from our peers and the society as a whole so much so that we often forget that we are free enough to move on and that we are tied up to anything…
    It’s just that we have to go in for a routine clinical check up of our goals and desires in life for bringing in clarity to ourselves whether we are doing something that we really want to do….
    And it applies to a marriage as well..
    It’s senseless dragging along a relationship for the sake of even your own children…
    Because what security will you be able to give to your child if you yourself feel like a slave in your relationship!
    It’s better that u teach your children about freedom and becoming more emotionally independent then to teach them about being slaves of their own invisible restricting thoughts!!

    Liked by 1 person

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